I bought a traditional house in the quaint and artsy seaside town of Ocean Springs, Mississippi, it doesn't even need a makeover, and it's now on the market for $15 million less than Cindy Crawford's!
|  | 
| My House | 
|  | 
| Cindy's House | 
| My House | Cindy’s House | Winner | 
| 
$125 per square
  foot! | 
$2,861.11 per square foot | 
My house! | 
| 
5 bedrooms | 
4 bedrooms | 
My house! | 
| 
4 bathrooms | 
6 bathrooms | 
You got me there,
  Cindy. | 
| 
Near the Gulf of
  Mexico | 
Near the Pacific
  Ocean | 
My house! | 
| 
2 acres | 
1.5 acres | 
My house! | 
| 
Regular visits from
  the rare and endangered Mississippi Sandhill Crane | 
No Mississippi
  cranes | 
My house! | 
| 
Nice neighbors! | 
Sean Penn | 
My house! | 
| 
Butler’s pantry | 
No mention of
  butler’s pantry. | 
My house! | 
| 
You may encounter
  the majestic American alligator. | 
You may encounter
  tiny dogs in overpriced handbags. | 
My house! | 
| 
But it’s okay, just
  shoot it if it comes too close before animal control gets here. | 
People in Malibu
  don’t have guns to shoot the tiny dogs, and what’s worse, their owners don’t
  think the tiny dogs smell bad. They do. | 
Alligators | 
But what if you need to live in California, you ask? Don't worry, it's a totally manageable commute! With the $15,000,000 you save, you can buy 30,000 500-dollar plane tickets. 
 
